A woman in India is supposed to learn how to cook and do household chores. Because who will, if she doesn’t? The harmonious equilibrium of a desi household gets shaken to the core if she doesn’t, right? She is supposed to learn how to study then work and then manage a household – all at once and with the same dedication and skill.
They are expected to run the house, manage all daily tasks and then if they are lucky enough they ‘may be allowed’ to pursue a career. Whether it is a career they wanted or one they find most compatible with the demands of being household work, is a totally different ball game.
Those who dislike household chores, or cooking and even, God forbid have hired a cook to help with the meals, are of course, ruining the good name of women. Or so this Quora thread would have you believe.
This one Quora thread sums up the debate in one beautiful question: Why do married Indian women dislike cooking and other household chores? Is doing household chores considered low-level work?
Because how can a woman not like household chores right? No, we are not talking about how inconsiderate it is of you to think that household work is any lower than that of any man’s, but no let’s not be progressive because what is the point of that!
But as dimwitted as the question may seem, it is this reply by a Quora user that leaves one speechless:
There are lot of girls of our generation who think cooking and doing house chores are uncool. What keep me avoiding thinking the same is a live example inside my family. My mother does not like cooking and doing house chores. Let me tell you, I always have witnessed small but unavoidable daily arguments between my parents only because of my mother’s strong disliking to cook. I took her as a negative role model and decided to try cooking and other stuffs with a certain eagerness so that I don’t get frustrated easily.
To think that she considered her mother a negative role just because she did not further the same patriarchy that was ingrained in our brains since the word go, baffles me.
But fear not, have other women who haven’t turned a blind eye towards this and actually had some good advice to share, like this Priyamwada Kaushal:
It is because household chores are actually forced on many Indian women under the pretext of tradition and culture. You might be a lucky one who has not been. No, it is not a low level job until your in laws tell you to do more of it because it is the bahu’s job, or keep complaining about the quality of housekeeping after you have put the best effort you could or even when there are other competent people in the house. When both are working household work should ideally be shared equally.
Another one such user, Sunayana Baid, pointed out a stark difference
Still I see in many Indian home , even though both husband wife are earning but chores are done only by one party . Husband chills and relax on sofa after coming from work and wife gets in kitchen. Same apply to handling babies.
Aneeta Babu N stood up for herself:
I hate doing house hold work, and if i was a rich woman I would have outsourced the whole of the job to others. I am sure my lack of love for household work would raise a.lot of eyebrows, but it’s not important to me. I think your attitude regarding your love for household work shouldn’t be too different either.
Even though our society is evolving, we are still quite far behind given the topic of discussion of this Quora post, because…
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