How do I find love? Where do I meet men? How do I know if my crush is gay? How do I know if he likes me back? How do I ask someone out for a date? Where do I go for a date? What do I wear for the date? Every homosexual, especially in a country like India, has at some point tried to Google the answer to these questions.
To make matters a little easier for those wondering how to navigate the tricky waters of the gay dating scene in India, Aniruddha Mahale wrote a list of dos and don’ts for single gay men of the world. The Gay Man’s Guide to Dating speaks about gender fluidity, modern love and the problems of every second gay man in the country who is struggling to find a lover / partner. Aniruddha Mahale is an architect, who is also a TEDx speaker and now a published author.
Whatever your sexual preference, the pressure of dating is real and pretty damn enormous. Aniruddha agrees that the dating life of a single man can sometimes be depressing and that’s why a guy writing about the hardships from his own personal experience, is a first. Excerpts from the author’s interview:
Says Aniruddha about the book:
The Guysexual’s Guide to Dating answers all your unanswered questions and sets you on a path of self-discovery and (a safe) sexual awakening. This is YOUR personal handbook for finding love, sex and long-term romance. It tells you what you should do, and what you shouldn’t, if you plan to find the One (or a Two, a Three, or a Four) and beyond. Simply put, it’s a guide to navigate the (sometimes) complicated world of Indian gay dating. And, let’s just say that it’s as complicated as the plot of a Christopher Nolan movie.
On battling with homophobic behaviour, Aniruddha says:
As a self-aware gay man who stays in Bombay, I’ve fortunately never been thrown out of club scenes for inappropriate behaviour. The fact that I don’t get ‘club scenes’ where I have been found in a compromising position, shouldn’t be a problem for other people though. But sadly, it will always be one. That’s where the homophobia needs to stop. If people can’t be themselves (with someone they love) at a pub, a restaurant or a musical gig, it speaks greatly of the state of the world we live in.
When it comes to romance, sex or relationships, being genuine is the one thing you need to be:
If I had one piece of advice to give to LGBT men and women who are trying to date, it would be to be the best, and the happiest versions of themselves. High cheekbones, charisma, an impeccable dressing sense and a golden LinkedIn profile might be sexy, but do you know what’s sexier? Genuity.
Why he chose the pseudonym, Guysexual:
Writing a dating blog can be an occupational hazard to your romantic life when you are a single, gay man. You don’t want a potential ‘plus one’ to read too much into your nuances when they stumble upon your blog in the future. The term ‘Guysexual’ is thus, an unbiased ‘no-holds-barred’ identity (pun intended) for a much-needed revolution – in LGBT livin’ and lovin’ and all the little things that come with it (STD tests included).
Published by Juggernaut, Guysexual is now available on their in-house app.