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Feeling like you haven’t accomplished anything in 2017? Let this Twitter thread console you

Let's take you through an awe-inspiring story by writer Eketi Edima Ette, which will help you understand the enigma that is time:

It starts like this: Just regular day, same old routine and then your coworker get a promotion. Or your friend’s startup starts doing really well. You’re happy for them but then the feeling kicks in- They’re doing so well, what am I even doing ?

Once you fall prey to this thought, the feeling of falling behind lingers on. Social media just fuels it- you see your neighbor had a baby, your cousin is engaged, your childhood friend bought a house. Does it feel like we’re describing 2017 for you? Do you really feel like you haven’t accomplished anything this year? But hold up just a minute- we’re sure you’ve accomplished something in your lifetime, right? So what’s up with feeling like you haven’t?

Let’s take you through an awe-inspiring story by writer Eketi Edima Ette, which will help you understand the enigma that is time.

Here’s how she started off her story:

Are you one of those people who’s looked back on 2017 and convinced yourself that you haven’t achieved anything? Worried about catching up with your mates who seem to have done much better?

Let me tell you a story about #time.

A thread _

— Eketi Edima Ette (@eketiette) December 26, 2017

We go back to when she was a child…

A long #time ago, back when I was about twelve or thirteen years old, my parents travelled to Uyo.

Before leaving, my mother asked me to prepare Edikang ikong soup so she and my father would eat when they returned.

— Eketi Edima Ette (@eketiette) December 26, 2017

She obeyed her mother’s commands:

As soon as they were out the door, I commandeered my siblings to prepare all the soup ingredients, cover them up and leave them on the kitchen table. #Time

— Eketi Edima Ette (@eketiette) December 26, 2017

But as any other group of kids would do…

We played our hearts out!

Climbed trees. Hunted grasshoppers. Played football. Watched TV. Scattered the house.

— Eketi Edima Ette (@eketiette) December 26, 2017

After a long day of playing…

And it came to pass, that the hour of parental return drew nigh and we were still at play and the soup was yet uncooked.

Then my sister, I think, ran into the room while I was lying in front of the mirror….#Time

— Eketi Edima Ette (@eketiette) December 26, 2017

….in the middle of giving birth to my fake baby, the result of my fake and unusually gigantic bedsheet pregnancy.

“Daddy and Mummy are coming!” she screamed.#Time

— Eketi Edima Ette (@eketiette) December 26, 2017

The kids tried cooking something up in a frenzy:

I dashed into the kitchen, yelling for my brother. He ran in, quick as lightening and like headless chickens, we gathered the ingredients, put water for garri on one cooker burner and the soup pot on the other. #Time

— Eketi Edima Ette (@eketiette) December 26, 2017

But it was too late!

I sent my siblings to go welcome my parents, and inform them that I couldn’t come to the door because I was cooking.

From the kitchen, I heard my mother’s loud voice. It was liberally #Time

— Eketi Edima Ette (@eketiette) December 26, 2017

Aaand like any other mom would say…

“Ideghe afere anke bogo anye abok tungho isua, k’enye atutungho idagha m?

Literal translation: “Is that the soup I asked her to cook since, that she’s cooking now?”

Life translation: “I’m going to kill her.”#Time pic.twitter.com/5BouVEmg1V

— Eketi Edima Ette (@eketiette) December 26, 2017

Little brother comes to the rescue:

My brothers and sisters, there are special demons that wait around for when a soul is desperate.
One of such demons was on its way to Balogun market, when it heard my mother screaming.#Time

— Eketi Edima Ette (@eketiette) December 26, 2017

It sensed that someone may be in trouble. So it made a detour and landed on my left shoulder.

“Is it not just soup?” it said, stroking my head with its scrawny talons.#Time

— Eketi Edima Ette (@eketiette) December 26, 2017

“It doesn’t matter what time the ingredients go in. Just pour everything inside the pot at once, turn it and voilà!”

As my mother’s voice and footsteps neared the kitchen, I was beyond desperate.#Time pic.twitter.com/X1QFOnEGV7

— Eketi Edima Ette (@eketiette) December 26, 2017

To be or not to be?

I could actually see the hooded figure of Death, standing near the fridge, giggling.

I took the demon’s advice. Quick as a flash, I poured everything – pumpkin leaves, crayfish, fish, meat, waterleaves, periwinkles etc in the pot and stirred.#Time pic.twitter.com/AaBVpW6PiL

— Eketi Edima Ette (@eketiette) December 26, 2017

Quick thinking comes to the rescue…

My mum stepped into the kitchen a second later.

“Ah, Mummy welcome o,” I said, adding salt and pepper to the mixture.

“Sorry about the food. I was actually timing your arrival, so the soup will still be hot when you return.#Time

— Eketi Edima Ette (@eketiette) December 26, 2017

Don’t worry. By the time you finish undressing, the food will be ready.”

All these I said without pausing for a breath, in that fast, glib manner of lying children who have suckled the devil’s left breast.#Time

— Eketi Edima Ette (@eketiette) December 26, 2017

As expected, the soup was terrible!

All the ingredients stood on their own, all separated by rivulets of water and oil.

What my mother did to me that day, is the stuff of legend and a story for another day.

My point is…. #Time

— Eketi Edima Ette (@eketiette) December 26, 2017

Every good cook knows that each ingredient has a different cooking time. Thus, they shouldn’t be added to the pot all at once.

If that is done, it’ll ruin the taste of the food.#Time

— Eketi Edima Ette (@eketiette) December 26, 2017

In the end, a lesson was learnt!

So it is with life.

Our individual success stories are made up of different ingredients based on nature and nurture, time, hard work, talents, God’s intervention etc.#Time

— Eketi Edima Ette (@eketiette) December 26, 2017

So kids, just give yourself some time and things will fall into place eventually. Happy New Year!